Memories

1923hrs: Just heard from my friend last night that the first girl I ever liked is now married to a friend of mine. I just confirmed it today. She was someone I used to like a long time ago but she did me wrong and I hated her for it. But I don't know why the news affects me. She's someone I've banished from my memory so long ago. I guess I just don't like being reminded of people I'd like to forget. It's been so many years. Coming 4 years to be exact since I last talked to her. It was just so long ago that I met her in my 14th year but everything came to a close when I was 16 or 17. She hurt me deeply and I've already made up my mind long ago to forget about her completely. Everything she gave I threw away or burned. Along with the memories I had of her. I convinced myself the person didn't exist anymore. There isn't any reason for me to be bothered by this development in her life other than surprise. Since she's my age it makes me wonder what made her want to marry so young. But it doesn't concern me but still I don't know why I'm bothered. The mention of her full name now resonates in my head. This is completely stupid. I've been listening to 4 different versions of Pachelbel Canon while typing this out just to soothe the confusion in me. But I think I'll be over it before this evening's end.

Still conflicted at 1935hrs